Yuk

I have a bug that is working it's way around every orifice in my body. Living off water and coffee at this time which is a great diet. So as for the blog, well I will get back when I can.

Woodbines

A great night at the Oak last night. Dave the sax at the helm and all regular members in the Band, it was 'smokin'. The Band were buzzing after Fridays gig and it showed as they played for a capacity 'standing room only' audience. I also received a phone call this morning from a couple that were at the Dance on Friday. They were over the moon and want to dance to us again as soon as possible. The OBB's story continues.

Dances with

I can honestly say that we have never let anyone down once we have taken a booking. However when the organiser changes the date a couple of weeks before the event, then I have to draw the line. All the OBB musicians do everything possible to be at gigs. In this case, some had to change shifts and even have time off work to attend. It is frustrating that we could have been informed up to 6 weeks ago, instead of a couple of days ago, as the hall had already been booked by another artist. I have 18 musicians to keep happy, and I will not have them messed around after they have altered their work and social plans so they could perform at the engagement.. So on this occasion the Band is going to withdraw from a booking, but in complete confidence that is not our fault.

Scythe

What a great night in Leicester last night. From the first note to the last note of music, the Dance floor was full. The audience had dressed in 1940s gear, and a prize was given to the best Female and Male (he spent more time on the Female), by our very own Eric 'The Spider'. It was one of the best stages we had played on for ages, with the trumpets and Rhythm raised well above the sax's and bones. The stage was that high that Derek the Bass had vertigo.
I have been getting some stick for looking too miserable in the recent photo that was in the local rag. My partner said I looked like the Grim Reaper!!! charming that. The fact is I would make a great professional mourner.....any offers?

Little

There is something to do almost every day when you are secretary of a Band. I received a phone call last night off the organiser of a Concert we are playing at in a few weeks time. It would seem that Willy Nelson the singer has hijacked the venue for that night and we have got to shift dates? I then have to contact 18 musicians to see if that is viable, so thank goodness for ooooh mail. However old Willy might get a shock when he is singing if he turns around and Eric 'The Spider' is sat there behind him, as Eric doesn't have e mail!!!!

Fox

Got my picture in the local paper today. Not quite page 3, but not far off. My boss said I am the face of undertaking? cos I am a miserable git (actually he didn't, but I think that is what he was inferring?) Having played that sax Cd I mentioned a couple of blogs ago, I am quite disappointed as I based it on the one track I heard on the radio. Actually I have got quite a few CD's in my collection that are also one track wonders, so thank goodness for MP3 players.

Bones Apart

The Trombone section last night at SBB was made up almost entirely of OBB bone players. I was asked if it was a take over bid? It is good for musicians to experience other types of playing and read harder arrangements .They all did a great job. Busy at work today and only 10 minutes for lunch, I will waste away at this rate ;-)

Bum notes

I had the unfortunate experience of having a vicar who suffered from flatulence in the limo with me today. Every time he moved there was botty burps emitting from his nether regions. I thought that perhaps he was having a laugh and had a whoopy cushion hidden somewhere about his person? But no he was blissfully unaware of his windy problem. I had to open the windows at one point, and was hoping for some Divine intervention. At the end he got out of the Limo, with a final farewell chuff and not an apology to be heard! Strange day.

Weather or not

Although I play in Big Bands, my CD collection does not have many swing albums in it. I do have a few Dorsey and Miller CD's but certainly no Saxophone players!!! That was until last night when I heard a guy called Alan Skidmore playing on an album called 'After the Rain'. The track he was playing was 'In a Sentimental Mood' which was awesome. So much so, that I ordered it today, but don't tell our Sax players, they might think I am a closet fan!!!

Everest

In October 2007, the Band decided they would like to do something for the Radio Derby Money Mountain appeal. We donated the services of the Band for a dance or Concert and the bidding began. Fast forward to tonight and we honoured the winning bid. We played for a 40th Birthday party in a Barn on a Farm. It was absolutely freezing and it is the first time that the lads and lasses have played in overcoats,thermals and gloves. It was hard to distinguish the musicians from the stands, as they were both blue! We played for 2 hours of Dancing and in the interval we were given a Hog Roast and buffet. I was in my element as I love animals and took a walk around the Farm to meet the dog,cows,horses and chickens (The pig was missing???). The Band were,as always, professional despite the cold and the audience were very appreciative. One lady came up afterwards ,to tell me that her father had been in a Big Band when he was younger. He lives on the east coast and she rang him on her mobile so that he could hear the Band playing. She said he was thrilled to bits. As always, I am very proud of the Band, but particularly tonight, as they donated their services for free, but they played as professionally as ever.

Winnie 2

Phew, I don't know if I have picked up a bug or what but this week has been a bit of a challenge to say the least. To be honest I am wary of hitting a high note or even coughing if that gives you some idea. Well I am supposedly overweight so this will go some way to reducing it me thinks. Oh no here I go again.......................

Bull

Early start this morning and had to travel to my place of work and pick up a limo and then take to another company back the way I came. We don't usually talk to our passengers on a job, but this particular lady was very chatty and had come from Spain to attend the Funeral. She could not believe how cold it was! I tried to get the Band a gig out there, but she could only afford Eric 'The Spider' so we will just send him. At least he wont need his cardigan?

Tights

My mate at work has just perchased (sic) a Parrot. He has called it Jambo, which apparently is African for 'Hello' It is only young, but picking up new tricks already. Apparently it gets great fun out of lifting the Basset Hounds ears up, and letting them go again, and the dog just lays there placidly while he does it? His house is like the Ark, with cats rubella's cockateils and a dog. Great fun.

Missed one

Been under the weather for a while now, and it showed in my playing last night. Although I only split one top Bb I felt really embarrassed, as it was a stupid mistake with not concentrating properly. Sometimes it is very difficult.

What key is it in.

This is short as not much time!!! How would you feel if you had driven all the way home after a particularly long and stressful day at work and found that you had left your house keys back at the office. No Comment.

Assaulted

Sunday was indeed a busy day and the Oak was buzzing Sunday night. We had a request to play The Peanut Vendor so we dug it from within the depths of Tim the Pads garage and gave it our best. All in all a good nights work.

Bangers

Missed my Sunday morning lay in today, as made my way to Newark to play with another Band. It was a nice intimate concert and even some familiar faces in the audience. Stopped for a Sunday lunch fry up on the way home, not very healthy, but no one else was serving food at that time? Got it all again to do tonight (the playing not the fry up)

Stella

I received a call in November last year asking if I could do a job with another Band in April this year. At the time I had just got back from the pub, and April seemed such a long long way away, so I said yes. Suddenly April rushed in and tomorrow I have to travel quite a distance to play in a Band and sight read for 2 hours? I sometimes wonder why I put myself up for these things, but that's me, always looking for a challenge and never bowing down to fear? Mad impetuous fool? when will I ever learn.

Alice

As the OBB is not my Band, I never turn a job down without consulting the committee. However, saying that I have just had to turn one down, and I am sure they will understand. It was a charity event for 250 people (stay with me) the venue was in London (honest you will be glad I turned it down) and it was on a Wednesday night..... Can you imagine us all finishing work at 6pm and then tearing down the M1. Poor old Colin the Vocal would be on his Mountain Bike giving it rock all down the hard shoulder..... Still it was nice to be asked. As the guy said, he wanted to start with the top Band first.

ring

Being secretary for the Band, means there is something to do almost every day. It is frustrating though, when the Band has been asked to reserve a date for an engagement, and when I chase it up nearer the time, the gig has actually been cancelled months ago? but no one has bothered to let us know. We were supposed to be playing this month for an engagement that was reserved in November last year. Although numerous e mails were sent for confirmation, I eventually had to track the organiser down by phone, only to be told it was off!!! It's unfair because 18 guys and gals of the Band rearrange their life around the events diary. But then again now days ,nothing surprises me anymore.

Dibble and Grub

I am incensed today so excuse me while I moan? (what do you mean again??) When they build churches you would think that they would consider that Funerals might have to take place? Not in this one unfortunately. How would you like your loved one, being taken up the fire escape? and all with a minister who is very blase about the health and safety issues concerned. Unfortunately he took an instant dislike to me because I dared to question Health and Safety issue. So much so that, after we had carried (as dignified as we could) the coffin back down the Fire Escape and gone on to the Crematorium, he drove past us and shouted "It was a doddle wasn't it" and all this in ear shot of some mourners. One of my colleagues hurt his side during the carry as well. It is very frustrating, but I have made it a mission to try and get it rectified for the next poor people who have to go there. In fact I am that angry I will probably practice for 5 hours tonight to unwind grrrrr!

winnie

At a Funeral today we had a piper playing. He did a tune called 'Mist Covered Mountain' a beautiful and haunting melody. I know this piece well because I played it many times with the pipes and Massed Bands in Tattoos around Europe. The Regimental Band I was in ,also played it once, and once only ,whilst we were stationed in Germany. The only reason that we played it the one time, was not because we played it badly, nor indeed ,because we did not have Bagpipes in the Band. The reason was, that as our Bandmaster announced ' We will now play Mist Covered Mountain' to the German audience, they all started laughing???
Turns out that the Translation of 'Mist' in German means 'Manure!!!!!!!!

Hello Dolly

Another fantastic night last night at the 'Nunny' Dance. Dave the prog had included some sequence numbers and I was extremely impressed with the standard of Dancing on the floor. Thanks to my April Fool e mail, the Band got their own back last night. Half way through the evening Michele and Derek produced a full female wig, and I had to wear it. I wonder if I am getting in touch with my feminine side. However those stockings gave me a rash around the top of my legs!!!!

Monkeys

I thought I was back at work last night? We were playing in a huge sports hall for a Dance. However even though snow had been forecast, there was no heating on at all. In fact some of the Dancers did the Sally Ann Cha Cha in Duffel coats gloves and balaclavas (ok the balaclava was an embellishment) It was absolutely freezing. But you know what. I never heard the Band sound so good. They would not have been out of place playing at the Tower Ballroom.

March Hare

Went for a drink at the Oak last night. Nice to sit and have time chatting to the Landlord as we never get chance on a Sunday. We swapped some hilarious stories about both our jobs, and it seems that if you work within the public sector, there are bound to be funny things happen. One of the coincidences though, was peoples abysmal time keeping, be it turning up for a meal or indeed a Funeral. On 99% of Funerals there is someone who I call the 'Duty late person rep' who turns up well after the service has begun? Same with Landlord of the Oak. If you have booked a table for 1pm then you should be there at 12.55 and not 2pm? Even then he gets grief as the late person thinks it's the pubs fault that they then can't fit them in? Nothing stranger than folk?

Derriere

I am glad this week is over cos I am extremely tired. Sat on my MP3 player last week so not a happy teddy, but it still works even after my12+stone was on top of it. Hope there are no bum notes in it now?

Never to late.

I have converted one of our staff at work to the wonderful world of music. At age of 43+ he has purchased an Alto Sax and I have gave him a contact for lessons. He is really excited, and so he should be, because if he masters it, it will open a whole new world to him. Shame all the hoodies and bad guys of this land can't take time to embrace music, because surely the world would be a better place?

2 for 1

Thought I had only managed one April Fool yesterday, but it seems that I also fooled one of the Band by saying I was having a wig fitted??? It seems they were really shocked by this and deliberated for over an hour as weather to ring me and talk me out of it. That was until their partner reminded them what day it was.....gotcha!!!!

Slow slow quick quick slow

As the master of wind ups I surpassed myself today. I sent a letter to my boss at the Funeral Directors supposedly from the local council health and safety office. It said that due to a European Law, all slow moving vehicles had now got to display a yellow flashing light on their roofs. This included the Hearse and Limo's......He fell for it hook line and sinker, although I will now have to find new employment...
The Band however ,did not fall for my e mail that I was having a wig made professionally, and that I would be quite sensitive when I wear it, so no laughing???? I had some replies, but sensitive did not come into it ;-)