Scrooge

I was very tempted to go and listen to the Band last night, but know I would have wanted to play if I had. I also had intentions of doing some more practice after the 4 hour Band call, but that fell by the wayside. Caught up with some old friends today, I got a hug and a kiss which I thought was odd for a bloke to do? Only joking, it was his wife. It would seem that the UK recession is slowly starting to bite in all walks of life. What really annoys me, is that some folk are getting alcohol allowance for addiction??? and this can amount to over £26 pounds a day!!!! I was freezing last night but out of principle did not put the fire on. It's not that I can't afford it, but the fact I do not want to add my money to the enormous profits the power barons are raking in? Actually it's my Dad's fault as when I was a lad the fire never went on in the front room unless it was perishing and icicles were hanging off my nose?

Pirate

Just finished a 4 hour Band Call for a show. I really enjoyed it and this is mainly because I have done it before ,so knew most of the pad. The bones did get told off for blowing to loud though. I thought pp meant Pretty Powerful? Oh well. Went for lunch on my own to a local Garden Centre. It was heaving with more mature folk queuing up for the Sunday Roast. I went straight to the head of the line a got myself a salad? healthy or what. Got back to find that I had been asked to pay for a Gilbert and Sullivan show at Chatsworth. Trouble is, it is the same time as the show I am doing. Isn't it nice to be wanted?

BM

A touch of the nostalgia's today. Went into town and there were Army displays in the Town Centre. A few Military Bands that had young kids(?) and older Males and Females. all dressed in Uniform. However, not one Trombone in sight? I had to hold myself back from asking the Bandmaster if he had any spare instruments in his van? Actually I wish I had now, as it was a chance lost. Saw one of my old Regiment and had a chat with him. Seems that now it is possible to serve until you drop dead of old age. Gone are the days of 22 years service and out in your mid 40s. Ah well there are some things I do miss, but many more I don't .

Bed Bug

Out for a meal last night and then to a well known superstore. I was really surprised on the amount of kids who were out shopping with their parents. Some as young as 5 or 6 and this was 10pm at night. When I was that age, I had been sent to bed at least a couple of hours before this? Come to think of it at age 16 I was sent to bed at the same time? Do you think my Mum and dad were trying to tell me something? Had a bad day today. But then again, if i didn't have bad days, how would I know when I was having a good day?

Strokes

It was fascinating today to take part in a Sikh Funeral. Not entirely different to our services, but the coffin goes home and is carried, usually by family members. It also went into the Hearse head first, where we tend to go in feet first. After the service at the Crem, a few family members go around the back to see the coffin being loaded (charged) into the cremator and then go outside to see the first puff of smoke, of which, I presume, is the soul departing on it's journey? A bus is laid on for all friends and neighbours and community leaders and is a really big affair. Then everyone returns to the Mosque. Having read a book on different Funeral cultures, it is good to see how other races carry out the ceremony. I was abroad once when round a street corner came hundreds of people and in the middle of them was an open coffin on it's way to the burial place. I nearly got trampled down and carried along with them? which would have been a novel way to go. Heard some good jokes by the porters today of which I will be trying out on our long suffering audience at some stage.

Top

Really enjoyed the blow last night. For once, it seems that my lip is in hooray. I still prefer the 'lushy' solos to all out jazz. Busy day at work and once again the time flew past. Still got to do a bit of overtime though and then ready for a break. Only it wont be!

Blowing

I have and always will be a people watcher. It is fascinating to try and work out what people are about. I think I learned this in the Army? On all Funerals someone is late. Yesterday took the top prize though. The service started at 2pm but a couple of people turned up half an hour late. In fact the congregation had just started to come out of Church. However the service was followed by a trip to the local churchyard for burial. An announcement was made for all vehicles to follow the cortege into the churchyard. The vicar will not let us lower until all were gathered around the grave. He seemed to take ages, but then in the distance we saw a couple toddling from the top gate, a distance of about a quarter of a mile from where we were standing. You guessed it. It was the same people!!! Today was almost a Groundhog day. Different church. two people late. Announcement made to follow at churchyard. All gathered together apart from.......yep the late couple wobbling down the churchyard. Only this time, they stopped and started viewing the flowers!!!! Bubbles, they must live in Bubbles.

Take

A great night at the Oak last night. We had five 'dep' players in all. We also tried a new number called 'Me and My Shadow' performed by Colin the Tonsils and Kal the Tenor. It went down extremely well. Strangely no one wanted Minnie the Moocher, hey I can take a hint. I am getting closer to the removal of the old wisdom tooth, but before that I have to do a show. I am working on a few excuses to get me out of having the tooth pulled. But I think bribery is my best course of action?

Marks the spot

It's funny how you start to feel guilty when you decide to do nothing all day. I think it is because you realise the time you are wasting by being lazy. So based on them feelings I spent an hour and a half trying to get a sidelight bulb out of my car. I know it is a little car, but you would have to have the hands the size of a child's to get anywhere near the bulb? I failed miserably, having used all sorts of ingenious ways to shrink my hand round the tiny interior of the engine compartment. Ah well. I consoled myself with a meal out and my favourite crispy duck (Sorry Donald) Watching the X factor when I got in, I am never failed to be amazed by the people who think they sound like the top stars. What do they hear when they sing alone? It's scary. If they had an X factor for Trombone players, I would not enter cos I know what talent there is out there.

After averaging 3 hours sleep per night since Wednesday, I was on reserve power for tonight's gig. Have you ever driven a car and suddenly realised that you didn't remember the last few miles you had covered? Well that was like tonight's gig? I was on automatic pilot? It didn't help that we were in the middle of the wilds, and some of the Band had real trouble finding the location. As always though, we were ready on time. It was for a great cause,as the money was going to a local children's ward. I stumbled through the first set which turned out to be a Concert. Using all the old material, it seemed to work, and a few people got up to dance even though it was billed as a Concert. The second half was shorter, as the meal and auction went on much longer than expected (actually, all the Band are experienced enough now, not to get wound up by this as the timings at Dinners Dances are never as the organiser predicts) All in all a another success for the Band, with the prospects of a couple of bookings next year.

Hair Cut

Why is it that when I am at my most tiredest, I don't sleep well? Been on auto pilot today like zombies dawn of the dead. I took part in a Funeral where there were quite a few of my old regiment. I still wear the lapel cap badge, but would never go back to a reunion. To many years have passed .I remember having to entertain the Old Comrades when I was still serving. The RSM said that no one was allowed to leave the bar until the last Old Comrade had gone to bed. Some of these old stalwarts stayed up until 6am.... and I was on parade with the Band at 8am in full ceremonials. I think I have answered my own question, on where my sleep problems come from!!!

In Time

Let me tell you about my day. Those of a squeamish disposition, read no further. People ask me how I can do what I do, I say who else is gonna do it? The day started working with another company and using there vehicles. These were old type Volvo's and when full with passengers, were very low to the ground. so low in fact, that when you went over speed bumps they made an horrendous grating noise as the sump scraped on the concrete. I thought of a great comedy sketch as I asked all the passengers to get out of the Limo as we approached a speed bump, then got them back in the other side. we only went over about 20 so you can imagine what a farce that would have been. Back to our premises and onto the hospitals to do removals. I then was asked to dress a recently departed in own clothes. Always a challenge that, and personally I think very undignified. I then had to conduct an operation to remove a Pacemaker followed by the stitching of someones mouth. Most people think we just drive cars and lift coffins.....there is so much more I could tell you, but it is before the watershed. Now I hear you ask, would I rather be doing that instead of being on the road with the Band. well if there are any millionaires out there who have a few bucks to spare, then please send them addressed to me via the Band. I might even tap Roy the wallet for a few bob for my early retirement fund lol (no chance there then?)

Refuse

Last night I scanned the play list for any solo's as I usually do. I only spotted one in Adios, so I thought I would be lazy and get each number out as we played them. Got to the second set after giving it all, only to notice that the next number in the order, was the one I had really struggled with a couple of weeks ago. It was still in my bone case after taking it home to practice. I had to whip it out quick (!) and went straight into it. I learned something from this. Because I had not got time to worry about it, I played it much better. Hence the saying 'Out of sight out of mind. it was still rubbish though.

Smoke

I can't have changed that much as we had an ex 9/12 Lancer come into our work premises. It was great to catch up on old times and find out what was happening to the people I knew. Been so busy today it was unbelievable. The time flew past which is always a good thing when you are at work. We have the possibility of a gig in London coming up shortly. I will know more in a few weeks, but that would be a first for the Band. Off to the other Band later, who knows what I will get to play?

Octopussy

Must have been a senior moment as forgot Sundays Blog. Talking of senior moments, we celebrated one of the oldest members of the Bands birthday last night at the Oak. Eric 'The Spider has reached the grand young age of 80!!!! He is still sprightly and knocks out some great jazz solo's and is a stalwart of the Band. In all the time I have known him he has never let the Band down and is the perfect gentleman. So here is to the next 80 years old mate.

Tea for Two

• Just finished an extremely pleasant afternoon playing at an Air Show. A giant Marquee had been erected complete with pro PA team. I foolishly decided to travel om my own and prepared 'Doris' my Sat Nav. I listened to her every word and she took me on a scenic route into the depths of Northamptonshire. I stopped at one point to check my map, but old Doris was right. When I got there, Roy the Wallet said he had had no problems with Daphne his Sat Nav and she had got him straight to the location via Motorway and 'A' roads' So when the Concert had finished I decided to follow him back. Doris following Daphne? she was none to pleased and contradicted every move that Roy made. Turns out though that Roy's route was 17 miles longer but 5 minutes faster. As I turned Doris off, she said 'Told you so'!!! An apology to John the Tenor. I dragged him out of the large tea queue to another van selling drinks, only to find they were 30p dearer. ooops sorry JB.

AM

Extremely tired today and don't know why. I had to work the CD system again at a Funeral. This time there were 3 different CD's and tracks to play. The chapel was packed as it was a young person and terribly sad as we had been in from the start of the incident to the end. You know it has to go right and a wrong track must never be played. So my work mates got me to do it. No pressure then. Actually it went very well. Most of the tracks I had never heard. One was called 'My Mama's Gone' by James Brown and had very poignant words. Listening to the life story of the person who had passed on, it was quite clear that she had achieved so much in life and everyone was proud of her. If we could all try to do that then maybe the world will turn out to be a better place.
On a lighter note, we are off for a day time Concert this weekend, which will leave the evening completely free, which for the OBB is a rarity over a weekend.

9/11

Anniversary of the Twin Towers today. I don't know of anyone who did not stand in front of the TV ,watching the drama unfold in awe. I remember we had a gig just after this and in Uniform. We did a minutes silence and as far as can remember played the USA National Anthem. It is a scene that everyone can replay in their minds as it was so shocking. I hope nothing like that will ever happen again.

Mariyln

I am not happy with my playing at the moment. Haven't been for quite some time really. I know most musicians go through bad patches, but mine seems to have lasted an age. I got through 'Too Little Time' ok last night but it could have been better. The only highlight of the evening, was an attractive Blond tapping me on my shoulder and asking if I was Glenn. Yes' I replied licking my eyebrows. I was just staring to get excited when she asked me if I was in the OBB? It turns out she wants to have a go on our guest vocal night. Oh well you can't win em all?

Cats and

I have not been dry all day today. It started with a trip to a local Crem, when I noticed 2 lost dogs wandering the fields. It was pouring and I tried to catch them, but to no avail. That was it for the rest of the day. there is no heating on at work (It's still summer) so I had to walk around in wet clothes. By the way I have a HD 42" Television for sale. It is in really good condition apart from the volume control , which does not work. It really is an offer you can't turn down!!!

Fairy Liquid

I have often mentioned that some folk walk around in a 'bubble'. They see nothing around them but there own little world. I met a gentleman like this on Saturdays Dance. He knocked my music stand and mic flying. Then he just stood and looked at it with a stupid grin on his face. it never occurred to him, to pick all the stuff up. Even his wife looked at him in disbelief. I was very professional though and only thought the things I wanted to say. Doh!!

Cats and Dogs

A quick 30 minute tootle on the bone and it was off to the wilds of Northants. It was a shame that the daytime events had to be cancelled due to the torrential rain we have been experiencing. However the 1940s dance still took place. The Band went on stage at 9pm in front of 700+ people. Again the Dance floor was full, even though some folk had not finished their meals? The dedication of the Band was proved yet again, when a musician of the Band suddenly realised he had forgotten his instrument. There was no panic, he simply got back in his vehicle and drove home. This meant he would have covered a 100 miles round trip in total by the end of the night. He got back in time and was as professional as ever in his playing. This could have been a remake of the Glenn Miller story, and to be honest, the amount of adventures we have all been on together, it would be a 21st century best seller. Again a great night for the OBB.

Wanging

Rumour had it that tonight's gig was cancelled owing to the atrocious weather we have been having. The gig is still going ahead albeit in a quagmire, but this is the true British Spirit and we can't wait to see Chell the vocals in wellies again. Having a chat with my Dad this morning, and he says that more of him sleeps on the bedside cabinet than in bed these days, what with his false teeth, wig and wooden leg... Ok so only one is true. Will let you know how we get on tomorrow if we have survived.

Gutter

Well it looks as though the great British Summer (sic) is over. It has not stopped raining today and of course we had a burial to do. Everyone had brollies except the poor old bearers. Now although I can't get my hair wet, it has the opposite affect on my back, The rain is soaked up on those with hair. Unfortunately the rain on the top of my bonce just rolls down the back of my shirt and straight down my back.
I managed a whole 45 minutes of practice last night, and remarkably for the first time I did not get toothache or a headache. The wisdom tooth must know it is about to be ripped from my skull in a few weeks time. Actually I am fed up with just eating on my left side, but if I forget it soon reminds me. The weekend is here, hooray.

Patient

I would like to take this opportunity to give my heartfelt thanks to a fellow musician. Who, when I asked for advice about wisdom teeth extraction ,he gave me these warm comforting words. Quote.
'If it was anything like my brother he had 2 hours of agony in the dentist chair and then ended up in Hospital.'
It is touching the compassion that can be shown in times of stress and anxiousness!!!!

Norman

Had the bad news today, that I have to have a wisdom tooth out. Now as a musician that is a major blow (or not) as I will not be able to blow for a while. Also I have heard of many horror stories where nerves have been damaged affecting the lips and embouchure? So I am really looking forward to this like a hole in the head (which of course it will be). I have a good dentist but he does not really understand the concept of being a musician. So now I am counting the days until it is over (lots) and see what the end result will be. I would rather jump out of a plane again, or even risk a glance into Roy's wallet. I am not a happy teddy.

Battle Fitness

I am always clock watching come knocking off work time and it is amazing how the last few minutes drag. I put it into perspective ,that with eleven and half minutes to go ,it seems ages. Yet that is the amount of time we had to run One and a half miles during the fitness test in the Army. This was with heavy boots on and after running one and a half miles in a squad before that. If you were outside that time then you were put on extra fitness training in your own time. I only failed once and that was just after smashing myself up in a parachute accident. I had been a smoker up to that point and realised that my fitness had gone while languishing in hospital. So I packed in the 40 a day habit and ran and ran, until I was fit enough for the next test. So the message is, don't wish your life away! More bookings for the Band coming in for 2009 and beyond so the gig list looks extremely healthy.

Torch

Another superb night at our regular Alvaston Dance venue. A full house, even though there was a free open air concert going on down the road. We gave away loads of prizes and played Happy Birthday 3 times tonight. The atmosphere within the Band is the best I have ever known it and it shines through to the audience. Also we played The Anniversary Waltz to 3 couples tonight spanning 21 to 52 years together. Wow they all deserve medals. A brilliant weekend for the band and as long we continue to work as a team I am sure we will have many more.